Not That You Asked, But...

Yes, indeed. 

This is not surprising. I have long felt that Lauren’s slaying was sexually motivated, and there is a long history of sexually motivated murderers with affinities for child pornography regardless of the age/gender of their own victims. It is to be expected. 

Very interesting indeed, thank you very much, I will be looking into these websites. 

You have just given me an idea for my next true update. To you and others who have posed questions about the interview and circumstances of the Wednesday-Thursday period of the investigation as Lauren was discovered, I will today write out a detailed analysis of the interview and my take on Stephen McDaniel’s behavior during that period of time. 

To answer one part of your question quickly before class, Stephen entered her apartment with a group of her actual friends who were searching for her. It is interesting to note how he switches pronouns constantly, as in “I…we…” which is clearly an attempt to put distance between himself as an individual and the investigation, he wanted to be seen as part of a group. Something compelled him to agree to the interview, and I have some thoughts on that I will share at length within the next several hours. Thanks for reading :)

THANK YOU. I felt that would be a viable option, using the window, considering its proximity to the trash bins aside the building. I will look at them ASAP.

…

Yes. Sort of. I’m separated and my husband is back in Israel [he is of Jewish Moldovan/Buryat descent but is an Israeli national]. The silly things we do when we’re young…

LOL, in childhood, when the movie came out, that’s all I ever heard! I had the hair, too. ;/

I am humbled by the fact that anything I have written could provide comfort in some way for Lauren’s loved ones. I have spent a lot of time thinking of Lauren lately, not Lauren “the victim” but Lauren the individual. It has become more and more of an emotional sore spot for me, because my heart is broken that she was taken from such a beautiful and loving family at a time in her life when she had the entire world in front of her. I have also gotten to know several of her friends through correspondence, and judging from their personalities it seems she surrounded herself with so many incredibly intelligent, warm human beings. That says a lot about who she was. 

I will say that so far, my opinion is that other than an initial struggle [as evidenced by the presence of scratch marks on suspect Stephen McDaniel] I don’t believe the bulk of the horror was committed while Lauren was alive. I don’t believe she suffered greatly or for a prolonged period of time. I wish I could say with certainty that she did not suffer at all, but Lauren was a fighter, no easy prey for anyone, so I do believe she went down fighting. I also don’t think her killer wanted or anticipated that, because all signs point to him having been a COWARD. More specifically, I view him as what is termed an “internalizer” type, which basically means he did not want to truly face his victim while she was alive. He most likely blitzed her in an attempted sneak attack, knowing Lauren was a strong and willful woman. I believe he was partially unsuccessful in that part of his plan and she managed to struggle while somehow incapacitated. The reason I believe she was incapacitated/disabled in the initial blitz by her assailant is that in my view, he could not have taken Lauren in a fair fight. He most likely would have preferred to knock her out completely before going any further because I do not believe he had the nerve to face her. From all accounts I have heard, Lauren treated him very kindly, which makes this all the more enraging. I hate to think that the last thing she saw was the face of the outcast she tried to help and befriend for his sake, contorted into the face of a monster. But I take comfort in my belief that because of his cowardice, he made sure she was not alive to bear witness to his pathetic urges and sickness, she was in a better place by the time the bulk of his “work” was under way. 

I have wept for Lauren, her family, her friends, especially after seeing the graciousness with which they conduct themselves publicly. It was like a knife to the heart when I read that they were simply hoping Stephen would help them to locate the rest of her remains. How dare he or anyone place a family in that position? They should not have to plead with him to reveal the location of their baby girl’s remains so as to give her a complete burial, how bewilderingly cruel. 

To answer the why, although there never really is a sufficient answer to the why, I am beginning to believe Stephen McDaniel would fit a diagnosis of Schizotypal Personality Disorder comorbid with Antisocial Personality Disorder [aka sociopathy]. This in no way lessens his guilt, he knew what he was doing and tried very hard to control the flow of events, but his thinking most likely has never been entirely realistic. He most likely had an active and often depraved fantasy life since he was very young. He, in my estimation, was fixated on Lauren and she was about to move away from the apartment complex he most likely stalked her in for years, disguised as the odd but harmless next-door neighbor. He had a key to her apartment, he likely had full access to her home without her knowledge, and this allowed him to feel close and in control of her. He knew he would no longer have that luxury, and he knew he too was about to face the “real world” which is not so forgiving and understanding of eccentric social misfits as college professors tend to be. Something in him likely knew his life and accomplishments thus far would amount to little out there when stacked against the litany of character flaws and social issues he suffered. These two impending realities acted as a trigger, and Lauren was the target of his need to control something, anything, in lieu of being able to control his own [in his view] inevitable failure. Also, I’m sure he knew Lauren would fair far better than he would and, like a petulant child, he resented that greatly. 

I believe the signs of his inevitable self-implosion and possible violence were evident throughout his childhood, but judging from what we’ve seen of his mother, it’s unlikely they were ever acknowledged or addressed. The key would have been to recognize his abnormalities and get him treatment, support, rather than to stay afloat in a sea of denial the way she appears to be handling herself presently, even going so far as to accuse an innocent man of being responsible for Lauren’s slaying. 

I’m off to class, but I will be posting the beautiful video made in memory of Lauren that has touched me so deeply, I watch it at least once a day. 

Thanks for your kind words, and please know how deeply sorry I am that Lauren has been taken from you and the rest of those who loved her. 

-Angel M. 

It’s been final exams week for me, just now getting over the trauma of that! 

At this point in the investigation, it feels almost redundant to post every new rumor or detail I learn of. I will say that nothing has come to light that causes me to doubt my initial take on the case, the motive. In fact, the more we learn, the more confident I am that I, unfortunately, had the right idea. But now that I have more free time on my hands, I suppose it is time for me to do a re-cap. At this time, it’s not clear that *anyone* knows for sure how Stephen presumably killed Lauren, all that is known for sure, I will summarize in my upcoming entry along with my analysis of information thus far available. Thanks for the motivation!